Monday, August 30, 2010


Sometimes this world feels like a machine.

We’re born into this world and we’re instantly taught how to walk, talk, eat, behave. A few years later we’re put in a building and fed information, tested on it, made “better”, “smarter” until we’ve learned what needed to be learned in that building, then we graduate. Then we move on to the next building where we get to learn how to do a job. Then we graduate from that building and start our job where we get to be slaves to the machine, and use our brain full of knowledge to make it better and faster and more efficient until we start to break down and get old and useless. And then we die.

Seriously? Is that my purpose on this earth? To be a little piece in this big machine? To have no individuality, creativity or freedom?

I know that I’ve been brain washed because everything I do or imagine doing that goes against that “machine mentality” feels scary and wrong. Why does it feel like conformity is encouraged so much more than individuality?

Wouldn’t it be great if adults actually encouraged us to question things? To push us to find our own path, our own truth in this life? The overall message I got from the teachers in high school was that college was the "right" choice. If only we could be encouraged to do what felt right to us, i feel like it would liberate so many of us from this “story” we tell ourselves about what we can and can’t do in this world. It’s only a story, yet it has the potential to ruin people if they believe it is truly who they are. I am so grateful every day for the few adults in my life who DO encourage me to question things and rebel.

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” -Harold Whitman

Also, this song makes me laugh and kinda fits with this post :)

Sunday, August 29, 2010


I think i'm afraid of sleep. It doesn't make sense because I love sleep, but when it's 2AM and everyone else is going to bed, I start to dread sleeping. I find useless things to keep me awake. Like right now, I'm writing a blog post when I could be sleeping. Yesterday I made chocolate chip waffles. Sometimes I think it's a way of avoiding my thoughts, because at the end the the day while i'm lying in bed trying to sleep, the thoughts I wanted to avoid all day suddenly creep into my brain and beg for my attention.

I'm tired of writing now. bye!

P.S. Here's a pretty flower from my garden!

first post

hi! click on my ads please! I'll write more meaningful posts later when my brain is working better.